BY EURIDICE NZIOKA,NAIROBI,JAN 11TH,2017-Communication and Respect
Communication is the key component in a successful marriage. Any communication breakdown can easily lead any relationship to crumble. How can a husband and a wife live happily together without communicating either verbally or emotionally?
A good communication in marriage is based on the respect a respective couple has for one another and should always be a two-way. Every partner should fully participate in communication, not where only one partner is talking, generating ideas and solutions to an existing problem. The first step to improved communication in marriage is through respecting each other. Only through good, true communication can you realize significance and joy of love. Good communication makes love possible, certainly makes it better, and ultimately may be love itself. There should be no secrets but sincerity and honesty.
In marriage, respect is essential. Sometimes couples tend to assume, dispute, challenge and reject each other perception especially when they have different opinion or views.
Couples should respect ones’ opinions, careers, interests, friends, ideas, and many more. When a man loves his wife, she will definitely respect and when a wife respects her husband, he will love unconditionally. Respect allows you to accept another person’s point of view whole-heartedly. Consider and value your spouse’s perspectives or suggestions.
-Attention and Support
In our day to day activities, there are thousands of demands that require our full attention ranging from our jobs, kids, spouse, house hold and your family at large. It’s not easy to manage your family and work and not to neglect one at a time.
But, despite all the responsibilities we have, the most important thing is our marriage and a married couple should never at any given point lack time for each other as there is always time for our loved ones.
In many marriages, spouses are ever complaining of being denied attention by their partners and a need to schedule some undivided attention is important. Undivided attention is very different than the kind of attention you get on a family outing or at the dinner table or at animal orphanage with kids. It simply tells your spouse that he or she is important to you, that your marriage is a priority, and that his or her thought and ideas are worthy of your time, concern and respect. With undivided attention, one can spare some time during the day to have lunch or few minutes after job for a cup of coffee or by taking unscheduled weekend trip for just the two of you. This will also help in rebuilding up your relationship .You can give your partner respect by listening to their concerns, joys, needs, dreams, and desires on a regular basis.
In marriage both man and woman are united together as one and therefore supporting each other is crucial. Spouses should support one another emotionally, physically or even psychologically at times of need, sickness and disappointments.
They should help in achieving one’s goals, making some dreams come true and encouraging each other in everything. Offering a shoulder to lean on during hard times, challenges and when one is in despair and arms to hold each other and say “it will be just fine darling.” Women are very emotional creatures and needs a lot of attention and love.
-Compliments and Recognition
There is nothing so lovely than to hear your partner appreciating.
Men are sighted human beings, what they see is what moves and draws them. Women are vocal beings, they love to hear being appreciated, loved, complimented and cared for.
Women in marriage need to please their men. Wear what he wants you to, the hairstyles he loves and when around do what pleases his eyes. On the other hand, it’s costs nothing to tell your wife, “darling you look amazing, beautiful, or you are my queen.” Men should learn to always appreciate their wives by complimenting them for any little thing they do like preparing tasty dinner, ironing your clothes or even welcoming you when back from work. Just say “thank you my wife.”
By doing the above, then each partner will feel recognized, honored and loved.
-Romance and Humor
Sometimes in life couples say, “How I wish we can revert to our dating times.” During dating, couples tend to be so much in love and so romantic. You would see a man inviting his lover for a dinner in his house, prepares tasty meals, clean the room and the lady would just enjoy herself. A woman would do the same.
Being romantic is not necessarily in bed affairs but some little deeds couples do can signify how romantic they are. Making one another happy and being humorous in marriage is being in great love.
-Best of friends
Marriage is based on compatibilities, commonality and above all true love. Sometimes couples are worked up with a lot of responsibilities and demands of their attention and this can easily tear a nice family apart.
In marriages, couples may prefer to have anyone else as a close and loyal friend than to have their partner. They forget that the other friend can leave you any minute but your spouse can’t. You can disagree, quarrel and even fight and after a while all is forgotten. He or she is your lifetime companion and you are bound together by a commitment.
Just imagine your partner has been with you during courtship and you are still together as a family, you know him or her well, his or her past life, weakness, strength and what puts a smile in his or her face. That’s why he or she must be your best of friends because you understand each.
All couples fight, disagree, misunderstand each other but when they are best of friends, it means nothing at the end.
–Love and trust
Love and trust completes the circle for a happy marriage. “I trust you” is a better compliment than “I love you” as many may not trust the one they love and may love the one they trust. When you trust your spouse, you feel so safe and free of concern with him or her. You don’t have to hide who you are or be self-protective. It’s sometimes difficult to be vulnerable with your spouse, but doing so gives your mate a chance to love and understand you. Trust isn’t given unconditionally. You have to be trustworthy to receive trust.
Love is build out of trust and in marriage it should be sincere, true and honest from both partners.
After all marriage is a life time commitment, so why not make it memorable!
There you have it.